Diary Of a Confused Girl
by Sky's Breaker
Summary: Kairi starts keeping a diary for the new year, but has a rough start. Her and Sora's relationship is dwindling. A one-shot, but there will be a sequel type thing soon to follow.


Diary of a Confused Girl

AN: Okay, so I just wanted to see how this would play out, me trying to write a diary for a character. It's Kairi's imaginary best friend.

Jan. 9, 2011

Dear Diary,

Today I felt betrayed. I am a confused girl who is in love, but at the same time, am not. Does that even make sense to you? You see why I am a confused girl, just living and waiting for something to happen? I hope so. Let me backtrack a little.

I was walking along the boardwalk with Sora today, when our friend Riku appeared. He waved at us to come over, so we did. It wasn't too long until they started talking together, and leaving me out of it. I was confused and hurt by this action, so I left.

They didn't even notice me leaving, because I never heard their voices calling me. I sat on my bed, and waited for the phone to ring, but it never did. Sora usually phoned me at this time every day, so why didn't he today?

It got even worse when I logged onto MSN, and Sora and Riku were not logged on. It hurt, but then I reminded myself that Sora needs his time alone, and that Riku was barely on anymore because of his girlfriend, Xion. Xion was likeable enough, just that we didn't get along all too well.

So now, here I am, writing in my diary, confused and hurt.

~Kairi

Jan. 11, 2011

Dear Diary,

I found out why Sora was not on; his mom had grounded him from the computer for staying out late a few nights ago. But what was he doing out late? He never does that unless I ask him to come over here to help me. I am so confused…

Jan. 20, 2011

Dear Diary,

I am really worried about Sora. He barely talks at all, and never answers my emails. He doesn't phone, and I asked Riku, but he said that I am just getting overworked about it. He says that I am taking too many courses in university, but I disagree. He's only a year older, and is taking twice as many courses! Why he tells me I am too overworked is beyond me. So, I shall confront him tomorrow and ask him the real reason.

Jan. 21, 2011

I didn't see Riku today, he was _sick._ But even better, Roxas, Sora's twin, was on campus. I ran up to him and Namine, his girlfriend, and asked him about his brother. His response: "Don't worry Kai; he just has to make some big decision." My rebuttle: "So? Why can't I be in on it?"

He told me that it was a secret, and that Namine didn't even know. That much was true, it was written on my sister's face. I sighed heavily as I came home, and then started this entry.

So, I guess Sora doesn't trust me with his life. Fine, if he can't tell me, then he doesn't trust me.

Oh, darn. I'm crying and I can barely see anymore…

Jan. 28, 2011

I noticed that I didn't put _Dear Diary_ on my last entry, and it looks nicer. So, if I don't feel like it, I won't write it down.

Sora still hasn't talked to me, so I guess he doesn't love me anymore. It's a hard concept to grasp, but it is the truth. Also on a depressing note, Xion was caught cheating on Riku, with Axel! I mean, I knew it would be like her to do that, but with Axel? He's my brother for goodness sakes! Riku was really upset when he saw them doing more than just friends things while they were over. I was helping Riku and Xion(Gag!) with some work, when Xion went to go get some _food_.

After ten minutes, Riku convinced me to see what was going on. So, I went downstairs to the kitchen, and saw my brother kissing the smaller girl. The bad thing was, she wasn't fighting back. It looked to me like they had a thing going on.

I quietly snuck away and got Riku to the same spot I had been not a minute before. He saw what was happening, and almost fell down the stairs. Instead, he stood up and yelled: "Xion, you lying, cheating… Go away!" And then he ran to _my _room and slammed _my_ door. I ran after him, and knocked on _my_ door.

He didn't let me in, so I just opened the door, lucky it doesn't have a lock on it.

I comforted him for a while, letting him let it all out, and saying he was sorry for not letting me in on what Sora is dealing with.

That is how my day went. Oh, Namine is home. I hope her date went alright. She is the only one of us who is able to have a stable relationship. Me, Riku, Axel, Sora and Xion are all on pointy rocks.

Jan. 29, 2011

Turns out we _all_ are on pointy rocks. Namine came home in tears last night. Apparently, they had fought while he was driving her home. It was about the same topic I had asked about. Well, if those twins want to play it that way, fine. It was interesting at the beginning because Namine is my little sister, and Roxas is Sora's twin. Actually, I'm thinking of making Axel not my brother anymore. Yeah, apparently to everyone, he's gay and would never kiss a girl. But now that we know his little secret, he is screwed.

On a brighter note, Riku has opened up to me a lot more. He comes over at least every other day, and sometimes walks with me on campus.

It's weird, not even a month has gone by…

Feb. 12, 2011

Well, I think I want to spend Valentine's Day this year with either Namine or Riku. Most likely Nami because the fourteenth was supposed to be her one year anniversary with him. Yeah, that is what I will do. Plus, Riku can join us if he so wishes to.

Feb. 15, 2011

Valentine's Day was depressing. Nami cried the entire day, and Riku spent the entire day making paper hearts, then ripping them up into tiny pieces. I did get a small evil laugh in, though.

Sora, whom I solely hate, decided to show up with a rose in his mouth and was wearing a tux. Before he could remove the rose to speak, I laughed and slammed the door in his face. That was the dumbest look on his face. Seriously, it was funny.

I told Riku and Nami, which made Nami smile and Riku give me a serious look.

"You know he is still out there."

"What? Didn't he get the message, I don't want him."

"Give him a chance."

"No."

So, that was the end of our conversation.

Feb. 20, 2011

Tomorrow is my birthday! I can't wait! I turn 21! On the twenty first, I noticed.

Feb. 22, 2011

My mind is reeling with mixed emotions right now. How should I react? Do I love him, or should I hate him for leaving me in the dark? Let me explain:

I woke up yesterday morning with a big birthday cake in my face. On it was my name artistically inscribed with a _Happy Birthday Kai-Kai! _on it. I smiled at my sister. Only Nami would do that. Also, Riku was there, looking at me with a worried look on his face. Why was he worried?

I got up and gave everyone a hug. Me and Nami danced while we hugged, only a sister thing. I gave Riku one too, but he barely responded. I raced downstairs, and ran into my brother. He turned around and told me that I had made him almost drop my present. Why he had gotten me a present was beyond me, because I had been so rotten to him.

For my presents that were gifts: A snow globe with a water fairy in it(Nami knows how much I love those things), a new laptop from Riku (My old one is pretty beat up), a book from Axel and the most surprising gift of all; a ring.

The ring wasn't wrapped, but it was given to me by someone.

I walked outside, like I always do in the morning, and everyone followed me. When I turned to face the road, my view was blocked by spiky brown hair.

On the ground, kneeling, was Sora, with a box in his hand.

"Kairi, will you marry me for all eternity?"

I gasped at what had just occurred. Sora, and me, for all eternity? I cried as I said yes, and everyone looked relieved. I asked why, and Roxas said that it was killing his twin that you didn't accept on Valentine's day.

Namine was looking at the ground, and turned to leave. I could tell she wasn't in the mood. But before she got too far, Roxas grabbed her wrist and pulled her close. She blushed majorly as I smirked, knowing that we all were happy.

Even Riku, who was single.

I'll make a new Diary after we wed, in the summer.


End file.
